The Tears of Christ

Charis-Kairos (The Tears of Christ) by Makoto Fujimura

How does a middle aged woman living in Dallas in the 21st Century grasp the agony of a Roman crucifixion that happened over 2000 years ago?  Let alone, the crucifixion of the Son of God?  What is it like to be flogged, to be spit on, to be derided, to be put through such physical, mental and emotional torture?  What is like to see your loved ones gathered at the foot of the cross, grieving and feeling helpless?  What is it like to have the burden of the world's sins heaped upon you, you who have never sinned?  What is it like to be separated from your Heavenly Father with whom you have been inseparable through all eternity?

My imagination and empathy can only take me so far.

But yet it is important for me to reflect on Christ's suffering by reading the Gospel accounts, not just on Good Friday, but often throughout the year.  It is important for me personally as I am one who struggle against suffering.  I hate suffering for myself, for my loved ones, for most living creatures.  And I certainly don't want to think about the suffering of Christ.  I am like his disciples, who did not want to hear about him having to suffer many things. He is after all the Son of God, the One for whom and to whom all creation was made.  He could wipe out evil in a snap, save his people with pomp and circumstance, but instead God chose the lonely painful road of suffering, of death on the Roman cross, a most hideous way of execution in all history.

I definitely see the need for atonement-the need for our sins to be dealt with, for us to be reconciled to God.  Intellectually, I can even somewhat grasp the way of atonement in the sacrificial death of our Lord Jesus, but I often struggle with the cruel and horrific way of the Cross.  But God's ways are way beyond me. I can perhaps understand just that much, just as I can only empathize with Jesus' suffering on the Cross just that much.  But how wonderful that the Son of God, our Savior, the One who hung on the Cross for you and for me, understands it all and empathizes absolutely and totally with all our sufferings and human frailties.  Because of his suffering, we know we do not have a God who stands apart when we suffer, but embraces us in our suffering, helping and advocating for us always with deep compassion and faithfulness.

I do not understand God's ways.  But I certainly rest in His deep deep love for you and for me!

Since therefore the children share in flesh and blood, he himself likewise partook of the same things, that through death he might destroy the one who has the power of death, that is, the devil, and deliver all those who through fear of death were subject to lifelong slavery. For surely it is not angels that he helps, but he helps the offspring of Abraham. 

(Hebrews 2:14-16 ESV)

Therefore he had to be made like his brothers in every respect, so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. For because he himself has suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted. (Hebrews 2:17-18 ESV)

In Remembrance

Painting by Tong Chin Sye

Singapore has lost a preeminent leader and father figure in Mr. Lee Kuan Yew who died on 23 March 2015, at 91.  His death marks not only the end of an amazingly fruitful life but of a remarkable era.

I was born in 1959, the year Singapore became independent from British rule, the year Lee Kuan Yew and the People's Action Party (PAP) pushed for self-governance.  His governance had shaped my national as well as personal psychic growing up. I have lived away from Singapore for longer than I have lived there, but the qualities that were instilled in me growing up in Lee Kuan Yew's young country as it forged its way against all odds are still alive and strong as I live my life here in the United States.  The emphasis of seeking equality for all people, "regardless of race, language or religion" still loom large in my heart.  The belief that hard work pays off regardless of one's beginnings and the sense of patriotism, loyalty, and implicit trust of authority are hard for me to shake off.  This is because I grew up in a country, though fraught with uncertainties, had a government that  genuinely cared for its people.

Many criticisms had been levied against Mr. Lee, some rightly so, but the man must be credited for doing many things right.  All we have to do is to look at the countries surrounding Singapore.  The contrast is astounding and testifies to his forward thinking policies, strictness, commitment, and love for his nation.  It is nothing short of remarkable that Mr. Lee should be able to inspire a people with such diverse ethnicities and religions to stand and work together to build a nation.  And it is nothing short of a miracle that a country with no natural resources whatsoever, short of its people, should within such a short span of time emerge from the chaos of Japanese Occupation and British rule to become one of the leading nations not only in the region but in the world.

I am grateful to Lee Kuan Yew for having been instrumental in providing me with an excellent education, an education that is equally available to everyone in the country, regardless of race or social standing.  I am grateful for the freedom of religious worship for all--for making it possible for me to worship at my church, for my grandmother to raise her joss-sticks at her temple, for our family friend to pray at his mosque, and for my science teacher to celebrate Deepavali without fear of retribution.  I am even grateful for his oftentimes swift and sometimes harsh crackdown on any hint of dissension that could create civil unrest.  I am grateful for the stable economy that provided ample work for my family and friends; for an economy that thrives on proper legislation and not corruption. I am grateful for the excellent healthcare system that took good care of my grandparents and parents in their twilight years.  I am grateful for the affordable housing that is home to many of my extended family and friends, and now my daughter.  I am grateful for the strict law enforcement that allows us to walk the streets in safety, and the strong military that keeps us secure at home as the neighboring nations contend with ethnic strife and dog us with persistent threats.  All in all, I am grateful to Mr. Lee for governing with such wisdom, benevolence and integrity, thus allowing his countrymen to live with much dignity and security.  Such security and accomplishments should never be taken for granted.

Mr. Lee's death brings to mind the end of a generation that had witnessed a horrific World War and self-centered colonial rule--a hardworking, long-suffering generation that took neither national security nor any achievement for granted.  Along with Mr. Lee and my parents, the majority of that generation has passed on; there are few that are left to remind us of the struggles of the early years of independence when Singapore could have easily gone communist or imploded with ethnic or religious strife. But instead, it thrived and grew beyond expectations because of the dedication, intelligence, foresight and passion of men and women like Lee Kuan Yew, whose love for country and countrymen took precedence.

Singaporeans from all walks of life grieve the death of Lee Kuan Yew, thousands braving the hot sun, standing in line for hours to pay their last respects.  Their devotion and sorrow are palpable.  They have lost not only a great leader, but a father figure. The difference between Lee Kuan Yew and other world leaders, I believe, is that he led his people not so much like a politician but like a father, a very strict but devoted father.  He had poured his life into his country and his people know it and feel the urgency of his care.

My hope for Singapore is that the qualities that Lee Kuan Yew and his generation had exhibited and  instilled in my generation, of dedication, hard work, equality, ethnic and religious freedoms will live on for many generations to come.  That honest, righteous, and fair legislation will continue to rule the day and not be corrupted by the influx of the super wealthy and the contradictory cultural norms of recent immigrants.
                           
I thank God that He was gracious to this tiny country by molding a man to become its leader during its crucial formative years, to provide Singapore with Lee Kuan Yew to lead and govern with wisdom, compassion, integrity, and equity.

Proverbs 20:6-8

6 Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love,
    but a faithful man who can find?
7 The righteous who walks in his integrity—
    blessed are his children after him!
8 A king who sits on the throne of judgment
    winnows all evil with his eyes.

Proverbs 14:34

Righteousness exalts a nation, but sin is a reproach to any people.

An Afternoon with a Beloved Professor

Painting by Charles Rennie Mackintosh

I attended a luncheon recently that featured Dr. Sinclair Ferguson as its keynote speaker.  Dr. Ferguson was my Systematic Theology professor back in the day.  I had him for the Intro class, Doctrine of God, Doctrine of Man, and even Doctrine of the Church.  What a privilege it was to study under him. He is a God-fearing, brilliant theologian with a big warm pastoral heart.  A rare combination!  It was a joy to see him that afternoon, to sit once again, even for so short a time, under his profound tutelage.

His message that afternoon gave me much to ponder, as do many of his teachings. He taught out of Romans 8:29-29, a very familiar passage on the surface yet packed with nuggets of truth that would take a long time to mine.  It is a passage ever so crucial to our Christian walk.

Here are some nuggets that stood out to me this time.  I am weaving some of my own reflection into Dr. Ferguson's teaching, so not all that I am about to write is what he said at the lecture.

In v. 31, the Apostle Paul asked "What then shall we say to these things?"  This first interrogative pronoun What is then followed by a string of the interrogative pronoun Who.  Who can be against us? Who shall bring any charge against God's elect?  Who is to condemn? Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?  I don't know about you, but I had not given the Who much thought before, concentrating more on the list of terrible circumstances like tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, sword.

Who then is the Who?  Satan is the obvious answer.  Because we are so entrenched in our material world, it is easy to forget that there are forces in the invisible world hard at work to bring about either good and evil.  I think if we were more mindful of how much is going on in the invisible realm, we would be more grateful for the good that surrounds us, and less taken by surprise by the evil that confronts us.  In this passage, we are reminded that we have an enemy who is perniciously out to  destroy the enjoyment and assurance of our life in Christ.  He will throw at us distressful and painful circumstances to try to undermine our assurance of Christ's love.  But we are to remember that in all our trials and sorrows, we are more than conquerors through our Lord Jesus who loves us immensely as to die for us.  Our ability to triumph over our sorrows and hardships does not come from our own inner strength but through Him who loves us.  Nothing, absolutely nothing, can ever separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus.  Instead, all things, even the wiles of Satan, are being worked  together for the good of those who love God and are called by him for his purpose (v 28).  And the "good" according to Dr. Ferguson is that we are being transformed to be like our Lord Jesus.

I have often taken the phrase "all things work together for good" in v. 28 to mean that God will work  all things out for good in the end, maybe not in my lifetime, but in the life to come or when Jesus returns.  For instance, all injustices will be put right in the end. I am currently working on a short story exploring that concept.  I certainly believe there is much truth in that.  It certainly gives us hope when we see evil triumphing.  However, to think of  all things working out for good  as first and foremost being transformed to be like Jesus is a new take to the verse for me. But if you really think about it,  it makes good sense.  Isn't to be molded like Jesus the ultimate "good" for all believers?  All else pales and appears temporal in light of our being changed to be like our wonderful Big Brother (the firstborn among many brothers/sisters).

I leave you now with this important question:  Do you, do I, really want to be transformed to be like our Lord Jesus?  Let us seriously think about that and not be satisfied with the expected surface  answer.

Romans 8:31-39

³¹ What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? ³² He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things? ³³ Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who justifies. ³⁴ Who is to condemn? Christ Jesus is the one who died—more than that, who was raised—who is at the right hand of God, who indeed is interceding for us. ³⁵ Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword? ³⁶ As it is written, “For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
    we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

³⁷ No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. ³⁸ For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, ³⁹ nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Ready for some Happy Colors

Since my daughters will soon be going shopping for nyonya kebayas, I thought I would post some more pictures of this very elegant and exquisite attire!

I am partial to wearing black and usually like things to match, but for my next sarong kebaya purchase, I would go for a kebaya that is bright like yellow, lime green or cobalt blue with colorful embroidery paired with a contrasting sarong. No shades of black for me here, please! Too colorful for my age?  Not with nonya kebayas!  Look at these women below.  They look as vibrant as their kebayas!

A Vibrant Heritage

Painting by Heidi Koh

Both my daughters will soon be together in Singapore.  One is working there, the other visiting her little sister. They are both grown up now, curious about their heritage, and eager to buy nyonya  kebayas for themselves and for me. This has prompted me to blog about my Peranakan heritage.

I am Peranakan Chinese on my father's side.  Peranakan Chinese or Baba-Nonya  or Straits Chinese describes a people that are descendants of the late 15th C to 19th C Chinese immigrants to British Malaya (now Malaysia and Singapore) and Indonesia.  My father's family settled in a fishing village on the east coast of Malaysia.  When he was 19, my father, desiring of a better future than what the small fishing  village could offer him, hopped on a pig truck headed for Singapore, carrying with him the dream of pursuing a tertiary education in Australia. He did not make it Down Under but established a career in banking, got married, and raised three children in cosmopolitan Singapore.

Although he did not consciously raise his children in the Peranakan heritage, I realized later in life that I am more Peranakan Chinese in my outlook than I am ethnically Chinese. The Peranakans through the generations have assimilated comfortably into the local Malay communities, adopting the language, fashion, and cuisine as their own, yet holding on to aspects of their Chinese heritage like their Taoist ancestral worship and Confucius' teachings, like respect of elders for example. They also absorbed the British culture; the British colonized Malaya in the early 1800s.  By my grandfather's generation, the Peranakans were more loyal to Great Britain than they were to China. I remember my grandfather as much in the habit of quoting Shakespeare. He served as Justice-of-Peace of his hometown for many years.

My grandmother was the typical nyonya (Peranakan woman). She wore the colorful sarong kebaya which comprised of delicately embroidered kebaya top fastened in the front by kerosangs (intricate, sometimes gem-studded brooches ) that cascades over a batik sarong held up by tali pinggang (belt made of silver, copper or gold). The mix of patterns can be quite an eyeful. But I think it reflects well the  mix culture that is vibrant and unself-conscious. Beaded slippers called kasot manek adorned her feet.  She liked her food spicy, the nyonya cuisine more Malay influenced than Chinese. She was quite the feisty woman; her temper as fiery as her food!

Sarong Kebaya

Kerosang

Kasot Manek

tali pinggan

Like most Babas (Peranakan men), my father was educated in English.  He spoke and wrote immaculate English.   He also grew up speaking a pidgin version of the Chinese dialect, Hokkien, which had many Malay and English words incorporated into it, as well as Malay.  It wasn't until he moved to Singapore and had to do business with Chinese from Taiwan, Hong Kong and China that he studied Chinese in a serious way.  He was an excellent scholar and picked up the language quickly and became well-versed in Chinese literature, as he already was in English literature.  But despite his mastery over the language, he was never thought of as being your typical Chinese.  He was much too straight forward and "Westernized" in his outlook to effectively handle the complexity and duplicity of the Chinese business culture.  He was after all a Peranakan at heart.

I don't know if I consciously raised my children Peranakan, but I know they appreciate the diversity of their lineage.  When they were younger, I was often asked why I did not teach them my mother tongue.  Which mother tongue?  I would on occasion reply tongue-in-cheek, knowing full well that they meant the Chinese language. I like to tell them that I am a Straits Chinese, not your typical Chinese, but that would only confuse them.  Ours is a happily confused culture; perhaps it is time I make a more concerted effort to help introduce and preserve this very unique and vibrant heritage that has so shaped my father, and subsequently me, and now my children.

Happy kebaya shopping, Girls!

Inspector Morse

Painting of Keble College, Oxford, by W Manhison

My all time favorite television series is Inspector Morse.  Loved it all  those twenty years ago when it first came on at PBS; love it still as I watch the episodes all over again on Netflix (eyesight and energy permitting).  I do like detective series in general and have watched quite a few, both British and American, through the years (preferring the British over the American); none however can top Inspector Morse.  The acting is incredible; the characters captivating (soulful, elitist and surly Chief Inspector Morse, juxtaposed by loyal, down-to-earth, affable Detective Sargent Lewis); the setting delightful (Oxford with all its history, academic prowess, and quintessential English decor); and the music magnificent, composed of mostly arias. The writing is beyond compare--the intricate plots keep me guessing with their many twists and turns; but my oh my, the insight into the motives and darkness of human heart is brilliant!

Here's Maria Callas singing  "Senza Mamma" from Puccini's "Suor Angelica"--an aira you might hear on Inspector Morse as the brooding inspector drives to crime scenes in his vintage red Jaguar or relaxes on his sofa, working on his crossword puzzles in his comfortably decorated drawing room.

You felt secure in your wickedness,
    you said, “No one sees me”;
your wisdom and your knowledge led you astray,
and you said in your heart,
    “I am, and there is no one besides me.”

But evil shall come upon you,
    which you will not know how to charm away;
disaster shall fall upon you,
    for which you will not be able to atone;
and ruin shall come upon you suddenly,
    of which you know nothing.

Isaiah 47:10-11

I Am with You Wherever You Go

Painting by Abraham van Strij

The beginning of each year brings about a certain trepidation to my naturally anxious heart.  I don't know what awaits me or my loved ones in the year to come.  I know it will have its fair share of happiness and disappointments as that is just the way of life.  What I fear most, however, are the big challenges - the unexpected tragedies, the formidable twists of life.  

And then I cloak myself with God's promise and assurance that He is with me wherever I go.  God Almighty, Creator and Sustainer of heaven and earth; loving Shepherd who gathers his lambs in his arms and carries them in his bosom; my Strength and my Shield; my Heavenly Father who spared not His Son but gave him up for me - it is He who promises to be with me wherever I go. 

And how do I daily cloak myself with God's promise?  By reading His Word - by studying it,  meditating on it and applying it to my daily living.  Then my way will be prosperous and I will have good success.

Chinese New Year will be upon us in about a month, and the words prosperity and success are auspicious words -- already adorning cards, banners, foods, etc; often etched in gold or red lettering.  Wealth and promotion in life are usually what these words evoke in this context.  But in the context of Scripture, one's ways are prosperous and successful when life is lived in the context of God's commands, facing the daily challenges of life with His strength and His integrity.

So whatever awaits me, even the formidable twists of life, I will have good success because God's Word is imprinted in my heart and God is with me wherever I go.

Come journey with me this year, by reading (or listening) to the Bible, and taking a passage or two to meditate on each day so that your way also will be prosperous and you also will have good success!

⁸ This Book of the Law shall not depart from your mouth, but you shall meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do according to all that is written in it. For then you will make your way prosperous, and then you will have good success. ⁹ Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened, and do not be dismayed, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Joshua 4:8-9